Milk Of Regret
by Daddy's Little Cannibal
Summary: COMPLETE! With Epilogue! When Edward said it will be like he never existed, he meant it. No one knows who the Cullens are and Bella is sent away to a hospital near Forks. I suck at summaries.
1. My Sanity's Suicide Note

**An Author's Warning:** Due to the increasing number of scary reviews I've been getting for this story, I decided that I would go back and give y'all a little heads up.** This is not a happy story.** _Nothing_ about this story is happy. I'm not going to tell you what happens in this story because if you're interested I don't want to ruin the ending. This is the first story I wrote on this account and it's also one of the darkest stories on this site. This isn't light hearted and funny like my other stories. This isn't a funny story. So, now you can't say that I didn't warn you.

**Summary:** When Edward said it will be like he never existed, he meant it. No one knows who the Cullens are and Bella is sent away to a hospital near Forks. Suck at summaries.

**Disclaimer:** I do not own _Twilight_.

"My sanity wrote a suicide note but  
One of us is illiterate  
And the other is blind"  
-Otep Shayma (_Nein_)

**My Sanity's Suicide Note**

"No!" I screamed at Charlie as I threw the clothes Charlie had packed for me on the floor. Tears were rolling down my cheeks as I stomped my foot onto the wrinkled fabric. I looked up to see Charlie staring at me, his eyes wide. "I'm not going." I told him angrily.

"Bella." He whispered, swallowing hard.

"I'm not going, Charlie." I hissed. Charlie stepped back hurt, I had only called him Charlie to his face once, and that's when I was leaving to with Edward into hiding, though I'd doubt he remembered it.

He shook his head, grabbing another handful of my clothes. I screamed at him and threw myself across the room, hitting his arms, as I fought for my clothes. Charlie stared at me, shocked. I grabbed the clothes he was holding and tried to yank them from his fingers with little success. His mouth hardened before he yanked the clothes from my fingers and threw them on the bed, I ran to them, but he wrapped his arms around my waist before I could make it to the bed and hoisted me in the air. I screamed out of shock and anger and started to hit and kick him, my fists and feet landing on various parts of his body, he continued to hold me as he dragged me out of my room. I wrapped my fingers on the door frame as I tried to pull myself out of his arms. Charlie continued to walk down the hall, my fingers slipped. I screamed and thrashed against his body. Charlie stumbled down the stairs, awkwardly, my abuse never fading.

When we got down stairs, Charlie threw me on the couch and went to his police uniform. I got up and tried to run up stairs again, I stumbled on the first step but I pulled myself back up. I got half way up the stairs before Charlie caught up to me and pinned me against the wall, holding my wrists behind my back, his shoulder digging into my back. I growled at him pathetically. He was faster than he looked.

"This hurts me just as much as it hurts you." His voice was hollow. I growled at him louder, I could feel the metal hit my wrists before the loud click, realization flooded my eyes. I thrashed against his grip but he only pinned my harder against the wall. The sound of the second loud click finalized my restrictions; more tears fell out of the corner of my eyes as I continued to fight Charlie. He led me down the stairs; I fought with him, my hands clasped behind my back. I felt like a criminal.

"He's real!" I screamed louder, throwing myself into the air. Charlie continued to lead me out of the front door, to the cruiser. He was annoyingly silent, I screamed louder, thrusting my body into the air. I hated what I was doing to Charlie, but I hated what he was doing to me more.

He opened the door to the cruiser. He put his hand on my head and pushed me in. He closed the door quickly after I fell on the plastic hard seats. I screamed loudly as I kicked at the window. He grimaced as he headed back to the house, his head was down. I continued to kick, long after the screen door closed. I wasn't giving up that easily. My legs hurt and my ankles were swollen when I finally gave up and sat on the hard seat alone. I'd given up on crying, though I knew I wasn't done. There was no hope of escaping and no hope of return, until I was "cured."

"_It will be like I never existed."_ Edward's words still linger in the back of my mind. I knew he wasn't lying when he told me, but I didn't know it was to this extreme. Edward had only mention in passing about how sometimes people found out about them being vampires, usually do to over imagination, and how he sometimes manipulated their minds to make them forget they were there. I never paid much thought to it, until I told Charlie about Edward leaving. Charlie didn't know anyone that went by that name and all the records in the school and the hospital were gone, no traces left of them ever being there. The only thing that was left that the Cullens had ever passed through my life were the memories and the crescent scar on my wrist.

A few weeks ago, Charlie and Renee' agreed that it was time for me to get "special treatment" After "discussing" it with me, Charlie went with his better judgment and enrolled me as a patient in the Washington Psychiatric Hospital.

I awkwardly pulled my knees to my chest. I never felt so alone in my life. I laid my head on my knees, my wrist scratching the metal handcuffs. After a few seconds of awkward pain and annoying muscle cramps, I pulled my knees back to the floor and waited impatiently for Charlie to come back with my suitcase.

He came out a few minutes later. It felt like hours. He threw my clothes in the trunk and opened the door to the cruiser. He sat behind the wheel and sighed. "Bells, I'm only doing this for your own good." He said sadly, as he pulled his seat belt across his chest and stared the car. I stared at him, giving him the silent treatment.

He stared at me through the mirror; his eyes were swollen and red. I snapped the air, I'm sure it looked pathetic but I didn't care, I was angry. Charlie sighed; his cheeks were stained with tears. I'm sure mine were to. He looked back at the road and set the car to drive, I glared at the back of his head, mentally hoping that a hole would burn in the back of his head. I sighed inwardly; I never get what I want.

The drive was awkward and painfully silent. Charlie would say sorry to me every now and then, I'd return it with a threatening growl. He would sigh and mumble something under his breath.

I spent most of the trip (when I wasn't growling at Charlie) looking out the window, taking in all the things that I was going to miss while I was "getting better." I cursed at myself for being this pathetic, for being this desperately in love with a guy that obviously didn't love me the same, if he did, he would have never left me.

I fought back tears as I stared at my new "home". It looked like a mansion, the only sign that it wasn't were metal letters on the side of the brick wall spelling out: "Washington Psychiatric Hospital." I hit my head hard on the metal railing that was protecting Charlie from me, well that and the handcuffs that were digging into my skin.

"Bella." His voice was harsh as he let me out of the cruiser. "I want you to be on your best behavior." I stumbled out of the car awkwardly, nearly falling flat on my face. Charlie grabbed my shoulders and helped back up. His grip tightened on my shoulder and his hand wrapped around the handcuffs, hinting that was keeping an eye on me. He led me to the entrance of the hospital. I groaned when I saw the interior.

Everything was white, except for the plant sitting by the front desk that was brown. I guess someone forgot to water it. I stared at it while Charlie talked to the nurse. I didn't listen to what he had to say. I stared at the plant, feeling the sudden urge get a bucket full of water and dump it on the dehydrated weed.

I jumped a little when I felt catalysts hands touch my wrist. I glanced back to see Charlie releasing my wrists from their restraints, the nurse was standing next to him, smiling. I growled at her, my eyebrows furrowing. I was in a growling mood today. Charlie pushed my shoulder, hard, giving me a stern look. I turned back to the tree, making a mental note to buy a water bottle and dump the contents on the cracked soil.

"Hello Isabella." The nurse greeted me stepping in front of me. I glanced up at her. Her red hair was tied back in a high bun, a pair of glasses rested on the edge of her nose. She wore what any nurse would wear, a white dress, with white shoes. She wasn't big but she was thick. She handed out her hand. I didn't take it, mostly because Charlie hadn't finished releasing my wrists from his metal restraints.

"Bella." I said softly, turning my head back to the tree.

"Ok. Bella." Her voice was annoyingly over optimistic. "I would like to welcome you to Washington Psychiatric Hospital; this will be your new home for the next couple of months."

I turned to Charlie, my anger rising. "How long do you plan on keeping me here?!" I screamed at him, making sure he heard the hurt in my voice. Charlie frowned and turned back to the nurse.

"Ms…"His voice trailed when he realized he didn't know what her last name was.

"Autumn. Jill Autumn." She smiled at him.

"Ms. Autumn," Charlie said, clearing his throat. "How long do you plan on keeping Bella here?"

Jill shrugged casually, her smiling never twitching. "It's really up to Dr. Burk, it depends on if he believes she's ready to leave or not. It usually no more than a year-" She tried to continue but I jumped it, tears falling out of my eyes.

"A year?! You're keeping me here for a year?!" My voice broke and I stared at Charlie, wishing that I just accepted Edward's request to forget about him. Charlie flinched.

"Of course!" Jill defended her voice anxious. "It probably won't take that long, that's only for extreme cases, I think Bella and Dr. Burk are going to get along just fine." She smiled at me. I turned my head. I didn't realize I was that petty.

I didn't see Charlie's expression, afraid to see the pain that I caused him. I was angry but I wasn't heartless. I heard a deep sigh before his voice broke the eerie silence. "I'll get Bella's stuff." I turned to look at him, waiting for him to smile at me, throwing his arms at me and yelling surprise as Edward and the rest of the Cullens pop up from behind the desk.

Jill frowned. "That won't be necessary; we have a strict dress code, here. So all clothes are provided, and anything else she might need." Charlie furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. Jill sighed. "There's been a lot of…" She searched for the right word. "Accidents here. And Dr. Burk decided it would be safer if we made our patients wear a uniform and keep them away from anything that might be damaging to their health."

My mouth dropped. "What do you think I'm going to do here?" My voice was louder than I was hoping for.

Jill looked at me. "It's just a precaution, Ms. Swan, don't take it personally."

"Don't take it personally." I yelled, throwing my free arms in the air. "You're taking me from everything!"

Jill sighed. "Ms. Swan, if you don't calm down I'll call the other nurses down here and we'll make you calm down." Her voice was venom, her eyes glowed I took a step back a little uncomfortable. After she saw my reaction, she smiled again, her face scrunching up. "Now if you'll excuse us Mr. Swan, there's a lot here that I would love to show Bella before lunch begins." She turned on her heels, leaving me alone with my father, if I could still call him that.

Charlie looked at me, holding his arms out in an awkward gesture. I didn't walk to him. He sighed, dropping his arms and patted me on the shoulder, instead. I fought the urge to nudge myself away. "Bella." His voice was soft. "Please get better." He turned around before I could react or maybe so I wouldn't see him cry again. I stared at him dumbfound as he walked out of the building, not giving a glance behind him. I swallowed the lump in my throat.

"Goodbye, Dad." I whispered, wiping away my tears before they could stain my cheeks.

**End Chapter**

**A/N:** Love? Hate? Want more? Confused? Too long? Too short? Tell me. I need to know. Review. I'll love you forever. The more reviews I get, the faster I'll update. If you're wandering, yes, Edward will be in this story. :D But that's about all I can tell you. Next chapter is where the real angst begins.

Daddy's Little Cannibal


	2. Good Intentions

**A/N:** You guys freaking rock. Nine reviews! Damn! I wasn't expecting that much, totally happy. Anyways, this chapter took forever to write, mostly because the beginning was a brat. I didn't know how to start it and so after seriously five different starters I came up with this.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own _Twilight_.

"The greatest harm can result from the best intentions."  
Stone of Tears.

**Good Intentions**

I sat outside of Dr. Burke's office, feeling uncomfortable in my new uniform. I looked like I just escaped from a catholic school. I blushed as I pushed the skirt father down my legs; my legs were long so skirts that were long for most girls were short for me. I pushed my knees together and leaned to one side, my elbow digging into the wood arm rest.

Jill left me here after the tour, telling me to sit quietly and not to touch anything. I didn't protest I was willing to do anything to get away from her. She wasn't the most pleasant person in the world; she was like the angry preschool teacher with the high voice that pierces through the ears. The tour was long and boring, she showed me around, pointing to empty rooms, explaining at each stop how a patient got creative and practiced some form of self mutilation in that room, which explained why we were no longer allowed this or that in the hospital, which explains why there are no doors on any of the rooms, well besides Dr. Burke's and the front.

According to Jill, a few of her patients got clever and decided to shatter their arms, one of them got a splinter in her arm which got infected and she had to amputate it, she killed herself later that week. The other two lived but joined her; they did a mass suicide, hanging themselves with a volleyball net in their rooms. We're no longer allowed to play volleyball.

The door opened to Dr. Burke's office, my head shot up. I looked up at was I presumed to be Dr. Burke, he was tall, his hair was a dark brown graying around the edges, he wasn't fat but he wasn't skinny, he smiled, stretching his whiskered cheeks, and exposing his yellow teeth. I mentally cringe as I stared at his yellowed smile, the words toothpaste past through my mind several times.

"Hello Isabella." His voice was deep and very inviting, I suddenly forgot about his yellow teeth, and I just stared at his glowing green eyes. "Come on in." He moved out of the doorway exposing his office.

I pushed myself off the chair, standing up with success, I smiled in triumph. I walked carefully into Dr. Burke's room, not trusting my feet at that particular moment. I was feeling a little weak from all the crying and fighting I did with Charlie earlier this morning.

The office was small, but filled with books and framed degrees, the books were most likely for display, but the degrees, from what I could tell, were real. I looked around the room, feeling like I somehow stepped into the movie _Girl, Interrupted_.

"How are you doing today Isabella?" Dr. Burke asked I could hear the door shut behind me. I didn't turn around.

"Call me Bella." I said still staring at the wall.

"Ok, Bella." I could hear the smile in his voice. "How are you doing today?"

I shrugged, I wanted to say something smart, but nothing good came to mind.

"Impressed?" Dr. Burke asked from behind me. I turned around to look at him. He was smiling down at me. I nodded.

"I had many offers after college," he continued. "Some even during, but I wanted to work with young people." He sat behind his desk in his chair; it was a cliché psychiatrist chair, the expensive red leather and the brass buttons making indents in the back. It looked severely uncomfortable. I took it as a hint to sit in the wooden padded chair across from him. The back was stiff and I had a hard time getting comfortable but I had a feeling I was a lot more comfortable than he was.

"Why?" I asked finally getting reasonably comfortable.

Dr. Burke shrugged a friendly gesture. "I like teenagers, they…" he searched for the word. "Fascinate me."

"That's understandable." I said, not knowing what else to say but still wanting to put my two cents in.

Dr. Burke leaned back into his chair, his eyebrow rising. "Is it really Bella?"

His question caught me off guard. "Yeah I guess so, it's not like you're doing anything wrong you're just helping us, right?" I cringed at the word us, I wanted to use them, but my mouth acted before my brain translated.

Dr. Burke smiled. "I'm glad you see it that way, Bella." He smiled at me. "Now tell me about this Edward?"

I cringed at the name and leaned into the chair, how was I suppose to explain something to him that I couldn't even explain to myself. I looked at Dr. Burke from the corner of my eye, his eyes were intense. I pulled myself up in the chair, straightening myself out. I took a deep breath, before beginning. "Well it all started when I first moved to Forks…"

I explained everything to Dr. Burke, well everything I was allowed to. I told him about how Edward didn't like me at first, than in Port Angeles where we had our first date, I explained it all, leaving out that they were vampires and other things that might be suspicious. Dr. Burke sat in silence nodding and jotting notes down every now and then. I forgot he was there until he spoke again.

"Why did Edward leave?" Dr. Burke asked.

"He wanted to protect me."My voice was a little distant; I was trying to convince myself more than him. Dr. Burke grunted.

"You don't believe me do you?" I asked, looking at my hands.

"Why do you say that, Bella?" Dr. Burke asked, his voice sounded genuine but it could've been from years of practicing.

"Because nobody believes me." I mumbled digging my nails into my palm.

"Why don't they believe you, Bella?" Dr. Burke asked.

I looked up at him, his hands were laced together and he was leaning forward. I sighed. "Because no one remembers him, they think that I made him up for attention."

"Did you, Bella, did you make him up for attention?"

"No." I said. Not liking this new obsession with my name.

"Hm." Dr. Burke lips tightened. He leaned back in his chair, tips of his fingers tapping each other. I turned my attention to my hands, my fingers becoming very interesting.

"Go to dinner, Bella." Dr. Burke said. I looked up at him, caught off by his sudden directness.

I stared at him. "Dinner?" I asked surprised.

Dr. Burke nodded and pointed to a clock hanging on the wall behind me, it was five-thirty. I looked back to Dr. Burke confused that our conversation had lasted for more than four hours. "After dinner Bella, I want you to come back here. We'll continue our conversation." His eyes glowed as he told me this. I nodded and got up from my seat.

I waited outside of Dr. Burke's office for Jill; she told me she was going to pick me up after our meeting. I wasn't allowed to walk around the halls alone; I had to have a nurse escort. I sat in silence, praying that it would be anyone else besides, Jill. I didn't have any luck; Jill showed up not more than two minutes later, her face stern, she looked angry.

I pulled myself out of my chair and walked behind her, afraid if I walked to close she'd turn into a fire breathing dragon and bite my head off. Her step was short but fast, I found it hard to stay behind her, she walked really freaking slow. She made a sharp turn, I followed after her, trying my hardest not to stumble.

She led made another turn before we walked into the cafeteria. I'd been in here before, but it was empty when I was last here, I wasn't expecting so many…patients. They all varied from different ages, to different heights, to different body types. It was easy to explain why most of them were there, the anorexics were the easiest, they were the skinny girls that were staring at their food like it was mud, which by the look of it.

Jill coughed loudly, bringing my attention to her. She led me to the end of the cafeteria line. I grabbed a tray and followed Jill's lead. The lunch lady stared at me; I blushed, not knowing what to say. She looked up at Jill. Jill cleared her throat. "This is Bella; she's a new patient here."

"Eating disorder?" Her voice was rough.

Jill looked at me and I shook my head. "Probably, her father says she hasn't been eating much lately."

My eyes widened and I shook my head violently. "I'm not anorexic." I said my voice strained.

They ignored me. "We haven't had her checked out yet, Shawn is planning on doing that after dinner. Give her the regular plate dinner until stated otherwise."

She nodded, throwing a piece of cheese pizza onto a plate. I turned to Jill; she was staring at the lunch lady, her face stern. I sighed and accepted the plate. I stared at the pizza; it looked someone cut a triangle out of a piece of cardboard and put cheese and tomato on it. I walked farther down the line with Jill, she handed me random bowls, each containing a non-appetizing item. By the end of the line my plate was filled with broccoli, macaroni and cheese, a cardboard piece of pizza, and a pudding cup. All of them looked the least bit appetizing.

Jill led me across the cafeteria, I followed awkwardly behind her. After a couple of bumps and "excuse me" she finally stopped in front of a table at the end of the cafeteria. The girls stopped talking and stared at me. I blushed and looked at my plate. Jill cleared her throat for assertiveness.

"This is Isabella. She is a new patient here." Her voice was stern and intimidating. I waved my hand awkwardly. "I want you ladies to make her feel welcome here." Her eyes looked at each of the girls but focused mostly on a girl near the end with short curly dirty blond hair.

"Of course mom, we would never do anything to disappoint you." The blond girl looked up, her blue eyes were shining she stared at licking her lips. I looked at the blond girl than at Jill they looked nothing alike.

Jill sighed. "Kathryn." Her voice was tired. "Stop calling me mom." She rubbed her temples.

"Why? Dad said it was ok." She smiled as she leaned back in her chair, her arm wrapping around the girl next to her shoulder.

Jill looked at me. "Isabella this is Kathryn." She pointed to Kathryn. "Next to her is your roommate Elizabeth," I looked at the girl next to Kathryn, she was skin and bone. She looked like she just came out of a concentration camp. Her hair was thin and stringy; her skin was a pale almost gray color, staring at her I felt like a house.

Kathryn leaned forward and gave me a deep glare, "she's mine bitch." She growled it at me. I nodded not wanting to mess with her. Jill introduced me to the rest of the girls, all of which names I forgot the minute I heard them

Jill made me sit next to Elizabeth; Kathryn wrapped her arms around her shoulder and pushed her closer to her. I didn't bother with mentioning that I had no interest in stealing Kathryn's girlfriend, so I just stared at my pizza. I looked at the rest of the girls, they were staring at me. I pushed a strand of my hair behind my ear and leaned into the chair, feeling uncomfortable.

"So what are you in for?" I looked next to me at the girl who had talked to me. She was heavy set, with long brown hair and dark brown eyes.

"Um…my boyfriend left me and my dad thought I was over reacting." It wasn't a lie just not the whole truth. I grabbed my cardboard pizza and bit into it. It tasted like dirt.

"Awe." The girl across the table said. She was the one of the few black people in the building. She was about my size. "How long did you guys go out?"

"About half a year." I told her, taking another bite out of my pizza.

"That sucks." I nodded.

"Was he your first?" The heavy set girl asked.

I shook my head. This got a roar of laughter from Kathryn. I looked at her; she was banging her free hand on the table. "We got a fucking virgin here?" She asked her eyes were glowing.

"You never know she could have had sex with someone else before him." The girl across from me said. I looked up at her and shook my head. I wished I paid attention to her name now.

"You are a virgin aren't you?" It was the first time I heard Elizabeth speak, her voice was soft and low, almost like a child's voice. She asked the question in surprise.

I blushed and bent my head down. "Yeah." I never felt more embarrassed to be a virgin. I knew it wasn't a bad thing, but still.

Kathryn laughed again. "Daddy's going to love this."

"Stop it Kathryn." Elizabeth said.

Kathryn stopped laughing and kissed Elizabeth on the cheek, her hand leaving her shoulder and resting on her knee. I turned away feeling slightly embarrassed, it was a personal moment for those two. I focused on eating my food.

"So how you liking it here?" The black girl asked. I looked up at her, half way through my macaroni.

"It's ok." I felt like I was supposed to say more. "I kind of wish I was home."

"Don't we all." The heavy set girl snorted out. I looked up at her; she was scraping the last bit of her pudding from its cup. I looked at my cup of pudding and back at her.

"Do you want mine?" I asked I'd lost my appetite.

She looked from her cup at me and nodded. Her hands reached across the table for it. She stopped half way and glared at me, through squinted eyes. "You're not anorexic are you?" I shook my head. She smiled and grabbed my cup.

"You know that's against the rules right?" The black girl across me asked.

"Shut up Alisha." The heavy set girl screamed at her, half way through the pudding cup.

"It's not my fault you're a fat ass." Alisha snapped back.

I leaned further in my chair. I was doing everything wrong today.

"Fuck you, you stupid little cunt! Just because I don't want to be some anorexic bitch, doesn't make me a fat ass." The heavy set girl stood up screaming.

Elizabeth cringed. Kathryn got up slamming her hands down on the table. "No the fact you eat everything in your fucking sight makes you a fucking fat ass you fat ass!" Kathryn screamed, her tongue dancing across her lips.

I looked at Elizabeth; she was curled in a ball her face buried in her knees. I could hear chairs squeak across the tile as everyone tried to get a look at the fight that was about to take place. I leaned further into my seat about to slip out, it was just a stupid pudding cup, I didn't think it would cause this much drama.

"Stop it!" Jill yelled behind me.

I had never been so relieved to hear Jill's voice. I looked up at her, my heart leaping in joy. I could see a group of male nurses grab onto Jessica and try to hold her back, while Jill got a shot ready. I turned my attention to Kathryn, not wanting to look at someone getting a shot. It was a stupid move, because she was getting her own shot by a different nurse. I felt my stomach flip and I turned my attention to Elizabeth.

"Jessica, don't you dare bite him!" Jill yelled next to me at the heavy set girl.

Elizabeth was sobbing into her knees, her thin hair covering her body. Her legs were white and no bigger than my forearm. Elizabeth couldn't have been more than 85 pounds. I wasn't fat but I felt it next to her. She was so tiny; she was like Alice, small and fragile, except unlike Alice, she couldn't lift a car over her head with her pinky finger. I felt guilty comparing her to Alice, and tried to focus my attention to my plate.

"Bella!" I was snatched back into reality by Jill. "In Dr. Burke's office now!"

I nodded, pulling my chair away from the table.

**End Chapter.**

**A/N:** God. I wanted to be further than this by now. Anyways, I thought this would be a good stopping place. My original plan was to have what's in the next chapter in the first chapter, but that hasn't worked out in my advantage. So right now all you have is this. This isn't one of my favorite chapters but it's important. It introduces the characters, don't worry none of them will turn into Mary-Sue's! And a Twilight character will either be in the next chapter or the one after that. Not telling who though. :P

Anyways, except a new update by next Saturday unless I get a butt load of reviews than I'll come out with a fast update. Thanks for reading guys. :D A new one-shot should be out soon.

Daddy's Little Cannibal


	3. Lolita

**A/N:** I really wanted to get this out sooner, but I was having difficulties with the chapter. I had to make it believable which is hard and still keep her in character, which is harder because she's not my character. I hope I did a good job. I feel really bad that this chapter took a week even though I got 13 reviews. :D Excitement! I also wrote a new story called _Stupid Shiny Volvo Owner_, it's completely different from this story, but I like it. This is my favorite story though. So if I don't do early updates it's not because I don't love this story but because I'm careful with this story, it has to be perfect. :D (Free shout out to anyone that can get the Lolita reference)

**Disclaimer:** I don't own _Twilight_.

**Lolita** – A seductive adolescent girl.

"I was a daisy fresh girl and look what you've done to me."  
-Vladimir Nabokov's _Lolita_

**Lolita**

Dr. Burke gave me a cup filled with pills, I stared at them before looking back at him. "What are these for?" I asked, never taking a pill in my life except for vitamins.

"Your medication, Bella." He gave me a cup of water to wash it down with.

I stared at the cup and than back at him. I didn't want to get into anymore trouble so I threw the medication in my mouth and followed it with a big gulp of the water. The water tasted like cotton and the pills didn't go down to easy. My stomach made a sharp turn before growling. I made a face and set the paper Dixie cup back on his desk. He smiled at me and stepped from behind his desk.

I stared at him, my stomach was turning into knots, I felt like I was going to throw up, he walked across the carpet, his feet hitting the floor seemed to intensify in my ears, I leaned in my chair, feeling light headed. I kept my eyes on Dr. Burke, becoming increasingly curious on why he was standing next to me.

"Bella?" He asked. I nodded. "Are you ok?"

I shook my head. "What did you give me?" I asked, my voice sounded distant, like someone else was saying it.

"It's just a couple of muscle relaxants, Bella." He told me. I shook my head to try to think straight.

"I feel weird." I mumbled, I stood up and notice I was having trouble walking. "I'm sorry, I must be sensitive to the medication you gave me. Do you mind if I get a cup of water? I won't do anything bad, I promise, I just need water." He nodded, and I grabbed the Dixie cup that was holding water only a few minutes ago.

I didn't bother waiting for an escort, I wasn't going to do anything, I just needed a cup of water. I walked to the water fountain by the front door, I was sweating. I filled up the cup twice, chugging the water in one gulp. My stomach was feeling better but I was still shaky, I was about to chug another cup when I noticed that tree again, the one that's dying. I sighed and stared at the cup, the tree needed the water more than I did.

I walked over to the tree and dumped the water onto the dirt, it wasn't a water bottle water, but it was close. After the Dixie cup was empty, I went back to the fountain and filled the cup for the last time, I headed back to Dr. Burke's room, still feeling a little dizzy but my stomachache had eased up a little.

He smiled at me when I walked in, he was sitting on the couch. "Do you feel better?" I nodded and took another sip of my water, I sat on the chair across from Dr. Burke's desk. He got up from the couch and sat on the edge of his desk. He stared at me, I stared up at him. The muscle relaxant was kicking in, I leaned my head back and closed my eyes. My body was relaxed and I felt like I was about to sleep, but I wasn't tired.

"Bella, tell me what happened in the cafeteria." I looked up at Dr. Burke, I'd forgotten he was there.

I thought about the question for a minute. "I gave Jessica the pudding cup." I mumbled, my head was rolling back against the chair, the room was spinning even with my eyes closed.

"Why did you do that?" I bit my lip and thought about it.

"I didn't want it, so I gave it to her." I mumbled. "I'm sorry but the medication is making me act weird, can I lay down or something." I pulled my head up from the chair and stared at him, he nodded towards the couch. I got up from the chair and sat on the couch, I rested my head on the arm rest.

Dr. Burke grabbed the chair I was sitting and set it in front of the couch. "Now tell me something Bella," he sat in the chair I was just sitting in. "What would you do if one of your patients broke one of your rules?" I wasn't sure if it was a rhetorical question or not.

"Forgive them and tell them not to do it again." I made a fail attempt.

Dr. Burke smiled. "Nice try, Bella."

"It was worth a try,"I murmured.

"Bella." I looked up at him. "Are you feeling ok?"

I nodded. I lifted my head up which was a bad idea. "I feel light headed, but at the same time very good." I laughed.

He frowned. "You think it's funny?"

I shook my head but continued to laugh. "No. I'm just_ really_ happy."

He smiled at me and chuckled. "How can I be mad at you?" He asked.

I shrugged and smiled. I was off the hook. Score on me. "Does this mean I can go back to my room?" I asked, ready to go sleep this off.

Dr. Burke shook his head. "We still have our therapy session to continue."

I nodded and crossed my legs under me. I stopped shaking but I was still sweating, though my stomach did stop hurting. "I'm feeling better, so I should be ok." I smiled at him. The medication was making me happy, I noted to myself that I should take it more often.

Dr. Burke smiled. "That's usually what happened when you mix those medications."

I frowned at him, which was hard because my initial reaction was to smile. "Those medications?" I asked. "I thought it was just muscle relaxants."

He shook his head and smiled. I continued to frown as he got up and sat next to me on the couch. His hand rested on my knee. "We have a theory here." I stared at his hand shivers crawling up my spine. "A theory that many psychiatrists are skeptical to test."

"What's the theory?" I asked pulling my knee away from him.

"Well I'm just going to have show you won't I?" He whispered it in my ear. I shivered and my heart started to pound in my chest.

His hand crawled up my leg and realization hit me. I opened my mouth, fighting to become normal, but the drugs were clouding my mind. "Please don't." I gasped out but I wasn't able to move anymore. I knew it was wrong, I knew I didn't want it but I didn't care. I couldn't get myself to care.

"This is what you want Bella." He whispered in my ear, his breath hot.

A single tear crawled down my cheek before he was upon me.

-

Jill walked me back to my room when Dr. Burke let me leave. The medication was finally wearing off and I felt the weight of everything that had just happen to me, slowly fall on top of me. Jill didn't say anything to me, so I didn't say anything to her. She led me to my room where I saw Elizabeth sitting on her bed, or what I assumed was her bed.

Jill walked off leaving me alone with my new roommate. I smiled at her, hoping that it looked genuine. "Sorry about earlier today." I swallowed a lump in my throat.

She didn't say anything to me, she got up, I didn't realize how short she was, she came up to my chest. She wrapped her thin arms around me. I stiffened, not knowing what to do. She pulled away first and looked up at me. "I'm sorry." She whispered.

I looked at her tears building up, was it that obvious? "What are you talking about?" I was smiling hysterically and voice was strained. "I don't know what you're talking about." I went to sit on the bed parallel to Elizabeth's bed. Trying to hide my tears. I looked back at her when I thought I could hold it. I couldn't.

I swallowed hard and felt the tears that had already build up roll down my cheeks. I was breathing hard. "Nothing happen." I tried to convince myself more than her. "Nothing." My smile was hollow.

Elizabeth sat next to me and wrapped her arms around me. "I'm sorry." She whispered again. "I wanted to tell you, but Kathryn wouldn't let me."

I pulled away. "You knew?!" I screamed, more tears were falling down my face. She put her finger on her lips, telling me to keep it down.

"It happens to everyone when they first come here, even Jessica." Elizabeth's voice was soft. I felt guilty for yelling at her. I sat on the bed across from her. She pulled her knees to her chest and stared at me.

"I'm sorry." Her words sunk in my eyes widened. "Does that mean?!" My voice was high as new tears came to my eyes.

She nodded. "I wasn't one his favorites though." She smiled into her knees. "But Kathryn is. She likes it though."

I crossed my knees under me. "She likes it?" I asked.

Elizabeth nodded. "Her father use to sexually abused her when she was little, that's why she calls Dr. Burke 'daddy'." My mouth dropped. Elizabeth smiled sadly. "She uses him for drugs, that's probably why she's one of his favorites. She would do anything for drugs."

I stared at Elizabeth, she was talking about rape like it meant nothing. I stared at her and shook my head. "How can you be so calm about this?!" I was crying again, the medicine had fully worn off.

Elizabeth crawled onto the bed next to me and gave me a hug. I leaned into her chest and started to cry again. "I'm sorry Bella." She whispered into my hair. I cried harder into her chest. "I'm so sorry."

I pulled away from her and looked at her. "Haven't you guys try told anyone?"

"Who would you believe Bella? Me or Dr. Burke. A patient that has anorexia or a doctor that has PHD in psychiatric care?" Her voice was stern but strained, like she was trying not to cry to.

It was my turn to hug her. We talked for awhile after we stopped crying, she'd been waiting for someone to talk to her about it. Kathryn couldn't sympathize with her and it was an unwritten law that we couldn't talk about it in group. She told me about her first time with Dr. Burke and how Kathryn basically adopted her after that. I told her that I doubted that I would turn lesbian and she laughed at me. We talked about our home lives and I told her about Edward, leaving out the part that no one believes he's real.

I ended up getting the bed farthest farthest away from the opening to the room. The bed was stiff and blankets were thin. It took me awhile to fall asleep. I thought about what happened today and what Edward would have done if he was still around. It made me smile as I imagine his strong arms wrapped around me, his velvet voice humming my lullaby. I started to cry silently as I wrapped myself in the blankets.

"I miss you, Edward." I whispered to myself before sleep took over me.

**End Chapter.**

**A/N:** I hope I still have readers. I tried to hint this in early chapters, but it was kind of hard, without giving too much away. I like it but there's still a lot that I could do with it. The whole chapter was hard, I wanted everything to be realistic and things like that. I hope I did ok, this is a work of fiction, it's not based off anything and all of that great stuff. Expect an early update because the next chapter is easier to write (I think). Anyways, I hope you like it and check out my new story _Stupid Shiny Volvo Owner_

Daddy's Little Cannibal


	4. Secrets

**A/N:** Due to a seven page research paper due Monday that I conviently forgot about this will be the only story updated today. Sorry guys! I know it sucks but that's what I get for not doing my work on time. You're lucky you're getting this, I'm really big on dates that I set for myself and I promised this would be updated every Saturday and today is Saturday. Anyways, **thanks to everyone that reviewed my last chapter! You guys made my freaking week!** And without further interruption, here is the fourth chapter to _Milk of Regret_. **Don't kill me!**

**Disclaimer:** I don't own _Twilight_.

"Nothing makes us as lonely as our secrets."  
-unknown

**Secrets**

_Two months later..._

"Don't touch me." I whispered to Dr. Burke, as his hands played with my hair.

"Most girls like it when I touch them Bella." Dr. Burke whispered in my ear, _most_ seemed to be the key word in this conversation. I moved my shoulder in a circle to push him off of me. He pulled away from me but grabbed my chin between his fingers. "Open your mouth Bella." His eyebrows were furrowed. I opened my mouth, lifting my tongue to show that I wasn't hiding the medication that he gave me earlier. He frowned and pulled his fingers away from me. He lifted himself off the couch, I could feel my heart jump in triumph.

His fingers drummed on the desk as he paced back and forth. I stared at him, my hands holding tightly to my skirt. I never kept my eyes off of him, my breath was coming out heavy and in short gasps. I promised Kathryn I wasn't going to take my medication so I was doing this sober. I could feel my heart pound in my ears.

"Bella." His voice was strained. "Why are you so opposed to being helped?" He turned to me leaning against the front of his desk. I bit my tongue and tried to keep my face straight, I wasn't a very good actress so I'm sure it looked ridiculous. He let out a deep sigh and walked to the door. "Go back to your room Bella." I didn't have to be told twice. I pulled myself off the couch and practically danced to the door.

I tip toed across the hall, it was after lights out and I didn't want to get in trouble for being out of my room without an escort. I stopped by the water fountain on my way out. The nurse was asleep at the front desk (big surprise there). I moved my tongue in front of my bottom teeth and pulled out the pill that Dr. Burke told me to take. Kathryn taught me how to hide pills within the first week I was here.

I drank the water slowly, swallowing the pill in the process. I didn't mind taking the medication that Dr. Burke gave me, in fact I preferred to take it rather than go at it fully aware of what's going on. The only reason I didn't do it this time is because I promised Kathryn that I wouldn't take it until after Dr. Burke sent me back to my room.

I wiped the water away from my mouth and headed back to my room. As I skipped across the hall, I smiled in triumph to myself. This was one of the very few times that I was able to leave Dr. Burke's office without anything happening. I felt tears of happiness build up in my eyes. I would have to thank Kathryn.

I walked into my room to see the usual, Elizabeth wrapped up in Kathryn's arms. Kathryn was running her fingers through her hair. I made my presence noticed by clearing my throat loudly. Kathryn pulled away from Elizabeth and smiled at me.

"Did you take it?" She asked, sitting up. I nodded. "When?"

"Not long about two minutes." I tried to sound calm, but my mind was spinning. I was still riding the high of the fact that I was still _clean_.

Kathryn nodded. I sat on my bed and crossed my legs under me. Kathryn gave me another look. "Did you swallow it dry or did you drink it with something?"

I nodded. "Water. Dr. Burke tried to make me take it with orange juice, but I did what you told me and it between my lip and teeth."

Kathryn smiled. "Good girl."

"What did he give me?" I asked, feeling absolutely nothing.

Kathryn's smile widened. "You'll find out in thirty to forty-five minutes." She reached over to the night stand separating Elizabeth and my bed. She grabbed a lighter and lit a cigarette. She took a drag before handing it to Elizabeth. "Jessica's pissed because you're Daddy's new favorite."

I grimaced and shook my head. "I'm not his new favorite."

Kathryn shook her head. "Yeah you are. He's always talks about you. He thinks it's weird that you don't react to him the way that everyone else does. He likes that about you." I rolled my eyes. I laid across my bed turning to my side to stare at Kathryn. I hugged my pillow to my chest and closed my eyes to fight the tears that wanted to surface. "Hey. Don't go to sleep, if you do you might not wake up."

I opened my eyes and pulled myself up and stared Kathryn, she was grabbing her cigarette from Elizabeth. "How do you get away with that?" I asked as Kathryn took a long drag.

She smiled. "I sleep with their boss! They're too afraid to say anything about me or I can make Daddy fire them." I swallowed the lump in my throat and rested my chin on the pillow in my lap. Kathryn was talking softly to Elizabeth. I looked at the clock, only a couple of minutes had passed since I took it. I was anxious, Dr. Burke told Kathryn to get this medicine for me and Kathryn only does drug deals, so when she told me not to take the medication I got scared.

Kathryn looked at me. "You feeling anything, yet?" I shook my head. "Aight. I'll be right back, I'm getting Alisha she knows more about this than I do." Kathryn pulled herself off Elizabeth's bed and walked into the hallway towards Alisha's room.

I looked at Elizabeth; she smiled at me and then pulled her legs to her chest. "A drug that Kathryn doesn't know about, that's kind of scary." She joked softly. I smiled at her, catching onto her joke. She was so fragile when she was alone, I wandered if I ever looked like that when I was without Edward, or was it just a lesbian thing.

Kathryn took her sweet time getting Alisha. I continued to lay on my bed, rubbing my cheek against my pillow. I never realized how soft pillows were. Kathryn and Alisha walked in, Alisha gave me a weird look, I was still rubbing my cheek against the pillow.

"Looks like it already kicked in." She laughed loudly. "'Kay Bells, I want you to watch the lighter. Whatever you don't take your eye off the lighter." She didn't light it, she just held the lighter in front of my eyes it was hard to see in the dark. She moved it left and right than up and down, I did as she asked and followed it. She yanked it to the right when all of a sudden it caught on fire. I let out a high scream and flew off the bed, landing on my butt in the process.

A loud laugh came from Kathryn, even Elizabeth giggled. "She's tripping." She said, still laughing. I pushed myself against the wall, feeling my heart pound in my head.

Alisha walked over to me, her face in front of mine. "Bella…ella…ella." Her voice echoed. My head shot up and I her pushed her away from me.

Kathryn laughed again. "Dude, she's tripping hardcore dude." I had a feeling she was repeating the word dude on purpose.

I looked up at her, my breath still hard, my eyes still wide. "Tripping?! What the fuck did he give me?!" I screamed, my eyes wide. Alisha sat next to me her hands rested on my shoulders.

"Bella! Calm down." Her grip tightened on my shoulder. I shook my head, tears falling in the corners.

"What's going on?" Kathryn asked next to her. Alisha shook her head. "I don't know. I've never seen someone react like this to ex before."

"Ex?!" I squeaked out, tears coming down faster. "You gave me ex?!" The last words came out in a loud squeak.

They ignored me. "Do you think they laced it with something?" Elizabeth asked from my bed. Alisha and Kathryn looked up at her. "It could be cotton candy, I've only taken it once, but I reacted similar to her."

"What's cotton candy?" Alisha asked looking at Kathryn.

"Ecstasy laced with acid." Kathryn looked at me while she said. She was smiling at me, her face started to swell up. I blinked my mouth dropped. Her skin was cracking, I could see the pieces fall to the ground. I screamed when one of them landed on my arm. I started to scratch my arm, her skin wouldn't come off. I looked back at Kathryn, her eyes stood out against her skin less face. Her muscle was pulsing. I screamed loudly and pulled away from her running to the door. Jill was standing there but her face was morphed. I screamed again and turned to see the rest of the girls with morphed faces, except for Kathryn, her face was still lying on the floor.

My hands were pulsing. I looked down at them, they were melting away. I could see my bones peek through the melted skin. I screamed as the pain started to sink it. I could feel and hear my skin fall to the floor. I stepped back into the wall, the morphed faces of the people around me stared at me in confusion.

I started to cry as I held my hands in the air. "Help me!" I screamed. "Don't just stand there help me!"

--

They took me the local hospital, eight hours of watching people's faces morph and me believing that I was a prophet. I laid in silence in my hospital bed, leather cuffs still attached to my wrist, during my trip I started hurting myself, leaving long thick scratches on my arm and bruises across my face and legs.

The door opened, revealing a doctor and two nurses. My mouth dropped open and I blinked it was Edward. I wanted to tell him hi, but the drugs they injected me with (when they finally figured I was off the trip) prevented me from moving, all I could do was lay there and blink at him.

He stared at me as he walked towards me, one of the nurses walked with him. She was tall and blond, she reminded me of Rosalie, but not as pretty. "She's an inpatient at the Washington Psychiatric hospital." The nurse told him. "She was brought in late last night on an acid trip, she has several self inflicted bruises and cuts on her upper arms, face, and legs. There's also bruising on her inner thighs."

I laughed quietly to myself, I wanted to yell that I could thank Dr. Burke for that, but I didn't. The medication wouldn't let me move. I blinked and continued to laugh to myself, tears falling down my bruised cheeks. Edward looked at me, his face was sad. I smiled at him at him through my tears. I'm pretty sure the nurses thought I was crazy, maybe I was.

"Thank you nurse." He whispered as he looked over the files. The nurse smiled at him and walked out with the other nurse, closing the door, I could only get a glimpse at her she looked liked Alice. Edward looked at me, I could feel my heart break. "Bella." He said my name loosely.

I smiled at him, a joke flashed through my mind. "Hey, at least I didn't fall down two flights of stairs and out a window this time." I tried to tell him this but it just came out as low moans. He was quick to pull the leather away from my wrists and ankles. My arms fell to the bed. I rubbed my wrists mindlessly, they didn't hurt as much as I thought they would. He ran his cold hand 

over my hair, I looked up at his topaz eyes. I started to cry as realization came to me. It was Edward, he was here with me. He may be my doctor but he was real. I sighed to myself and smiled at him. He placed a cold hand on my forehead I closed my eyes.

"Bella." He whispered, I looked up at him. "I'm so sorry."

I shrugged, I waited for the pain that never came. I smiled to myself in triumph, they must have me on good medication, nothing hurt, though I'm sure I looked pathetic.

"Don't worry Bella. We'll get him." He whispered into my hair as he kissed my forehead. I smiled to myself and snuggled into his touch. I didn't know who were getting or why he kept on saying my name, I just knew that for the first time in a long time I was happy.

"Bella!" Someone screamed at me waking me up. I flinched as the pain coursed through my body. I looked up to see Dr. Burke stand over me with another doctor. I moved my wrists but they were still strapped over my head. I groaned and let them fall against the restraints. It was just a dream…just a stupid fucking dream.

"How are you feeling today Bella?" The doctor asked, his voice was very feminine, if it wasn't for the ring on his finger I would have thought he was swung the other way.

My mouth and throat was dry. "I'm ok." I lied my voice was raspy and my throat hurt.

"You gave us quite a scare missy, but we'll get you better." He smiled at me. I didn't smile back.

**End Chapter.**

**A/N:** DON'T KILL ME! Seriously guys! I would like to point to the category selection where it says angst. See? I told you Edward was going to be in this story. :P Kidding. Seriously he will be in this story and actually him not dream Edward. Also a poll is running on my profile. Vote if you want a happy or sad ending. So far it's a tie between Happy and both happy and sad. No one has voted for sad…you guys suck. :P I hope you enjoyed the chapter and please drop a review off. :D NEW STORY! Check it out it's called _Coffin of Love._

Daddy's Little Cannibal.


	5. Hope

**A/N:**** This is the last chapter. **I'm sad. I love this story and I figured if I was going to have a happy ending it should be now. It's not like happily ever after happy ending, more like bittersweet. It doesn't leave you like smiling, but it's a lot better than the sad ending. Anyways, I'm sure that most of ya'll aren't reading this anyways. **Read the epilogue!**

**Disclaimer:** I don't own _Twilight_.

"I'm afraid to believe that there is hope somewhere in my black heart for the darkness to be shown the light."  
-Jedidiah Knight

**Hope**

"She's in the hospital." Alice's words sank in slowly as the phone stayed at my ear. I shook my head, it was Bella, she's always in the hospital for one reason or another.

I swallowed the lump in my throat. "Relax Alice, she probably tripped and fell. You know how Bella is." I tried to sound braver than I really was.

"Not that hospital Edward, she's an inpatient at the Washington Psychiatric Hospital." Her words pierced through me, if I wasn't already sitting down I would have fallen to the ground. Bella, _my _Bella, was in the Psychiatric hospital. If I was human I would have cried, I wanted to cry, I wanted to do anything to release the pain I was feeling.

"Why?" I knew why, in fact I wanted anything but for Alice to tell me why, it would be too painful.

"I don't know." She was lying.

"Is she ok?" I asked I didn't want Alice to stop talking.

"She's in the hospital that Carlisle is working at the moment. Apparently someone slipped her acid and she had a bad trip. Her body is bruised and her arms are scarred…" She was hesitating to tell me something.

"Tell me Alice." I demanded I needed to know.

"There's bruising on her inner thighs. Carlisle is waiting for her to wake up so he can get her permission…he wants to use the rape kit on her."

I didn't wait for her to say more, I flipped the phone shut and swerved the car. I stopped the car on the side of the road. I clenched my fists onto the steering wheel and banged my head on the dashboard. Anger was pouring through my veins. I growled angrily as I punched my steering wheel. I never wanted to cry so badly in my life, nothing hurt this much. I did this to her, I was trying to protect her, but in the process I hurt her, more than I could ever had.

I pushed open the car door and walked into the forest. I started punching down trees and rocks whenever I felt the anger become too much. I was hurting emotionally, now I wanted to hurt physically, but it's hard to hurt a vampire.

I spent hours punching rocks and trees, sometimes I even hunted down small animals. I wanted to do anything that stopped the pain I felt for Bella. It's been six months since I saw her, six months of pretending that she was happy, that she was safe. But it was all a lie. I pulled the rabbit from my lips and wiped the blood away from my mouth. My hands were covered in dirt and dried blood. I pulled myself away from the dead animal and curled up into a ball. I had to see her, I had to protect her, but the question was: did she want to see me?

--

"She won't consent." Carlisle told me the phone. I was in the car again, heading back to Washington; if I hurried I could probably be there by late night, early morning. I glanced at the speed meter, 120, I pressed harder on the accelerator.

"Why not?" I spat into the phone.

Carlisle sighed. "She's scared. She's not looking good Edward. They think the acid might have made some permanent damage, along with emotional trauma that she faced in the hospital. We've called the police; they're investigating the hospital that she's staying at. If they don't find anything, Bella's going to have to go back…" He trailed off.

I closed my eyes and tried to suppress my anger, getting mad at Carlisle wasn't going to make the situation any easier. "Has Alice to talk to her?" I asked finally, she liked Alice.

"I haven't been able to get her alone, she's been surrounded by police and doctors."

I nodded and let out a deep breath, it was more habit than a necessity. "I'll be there as soon as I can. I'm in Nevada right now." I didn't let Carlisle respond; I closed the cell phone quickly and looked at the road. His words flooded my thoughts. She was suffering emotional trauma. What had they done to my Bella?

--

Carlisle was frowning at me, I felt shame wrap around me. It took me awhile to be convinced that he was actually here and not some illusion, but that didn't change the fact that no one knew who he was and even if I did say something, he would just disappear again. He spent hundreds of years learning to escape from difficult situations, besides who the heck would believe a crazy girl anyways.

"Are you ok, Miss?" The female police officer asked.

I looked up at her and nodded. "Yeah, I'm fine." I lied.

She frowned at me before glancing at Carlisle and the other male police officer. "Do you mind if I talk to Ms. Swan alone." They nodded before, leaving the room. She sat on the edge of my bed; she kept her hands to herself. Thank God for small miracles, I was tired of people touching me.

She let out a deep sigh, her green eyes shined through her blond bangs. "Bella, has Dr. Burke ever made any sexual advances towards you, verbally or physically?" I shook my head. She let out another deep sigh, she closed her eyes. "Bella, the other girls told me what was going on. We're only here to help you, if you just go through with this, he'll never hurt you again."

I shook my head, not caring if she was telling the truth or not. There was no way I was going to admit to anything that happened in the last two months.

"Bella, even if nothing happened, please let us do the test…it won't hurt only help you Bella." She persisted.

I shook my head.

She let out a deep sigh before pulling herself off the hospital bed. She frowned at me before walking out of the room. I sighed to myself before rolling over to my side, it was dark outside. I pulled the covers over my head and started to cry. I spent my whole stay at Washington Psychiatric Hospital waiting for the moment I could tell someone, but now that it's here, I'm letting it pass through my fingertips.

This was one of the few moments that I was alone, so I took advantage of it. I continued to cry to myself, wrapping the thin blanket around my body. I looked down at my arms; they were covered in bandages and gauze. I thought drugs were supposed to be fun.

The door opened again. I groaned loudly to myself and let out a sob, I flipped over to yell at them to leave me alone when I saw him.

--

Her right eye was swollen and bruised; gauzes were laced up her arms. She frowned at me and looked like she was about to cry. I walked cautiously to her, my hands out in the open, a sign that I wasn't going to hurt her. She gulped before sitting up in her bed; I walked to the side of her bed. My hand cautiously went to the side of her cheek she didn't flinch or move. She stayed perfectly stilled, like a beautiful statue. My hand grazed her cheek. She whimpered when my finger grazed over a tender spot.

"What happened to you Bella?" I whispered, knowing the answer all too well. I pulled my hand away from her.

Tears were falling down her swollen cheeks, she jumped at me, her hands wrapping around my neck, her head buried into my chest. I could feel her tears leak through my shirt. I kept my hands at my side; afraid to touch her in case I hurt her, her action caught me off guard. "I'm sorry," she whispered. "I'm so sorry."

I shook my head and decided hugged her back. "You have nothing to be sorry about. Nothing." I added the extra nothing for clarification.

She pulled away from me and started to rub her cheeks with the back of her hand. She was breathing hard, I wanted to hold her in my arms and kiss her, I wanted to steal her away from all the tortures of the world, but I didn't know how she would react to me. The fact she hadn't run away screaming is a miracle of its own. I stood there in the tormenting silence as I waited for Bella's next move. I hated not being able to read her mind.

"I want to become a vampire." She finally told me. My face dropped as I stared at the beautiful fragile girl in front of me. Of all the things that she could say this was the one that I least expected. My original reaction was to say no, but I didn't want to hurt her. I stood in silence as I thought of a good response to her outburst. "I want to become a vampire because there's nothing left for me as a human Edward. I don't have any friends or family." Her words were dark and heavy with hate. I've never seen this side o f Bella before. It hurt.

"What about Charlie and Renee'?" I asked, wanting to buy time so she could think about it a little more.

She shook her head. "We'll tell them I died." Her words were harsh.

"Bella…" I whispered. I thought about this moment for months, the day that I might see her again. This never even crossed my mind; the thought of killing Bella scared me. The thought of letting her going back to the place that brought her here in the first place scared me more.

"Edward." Her voice was strained from the tears she was holding back. "I've never wanted anything more in my life." The tears were falling down her cheek. "They won't convict him Edward, they won't arrest him, and as soon as they're done with me here, they'll make me go back to him." Her body was shaking with sobs. "I don't want to go back to him."

I wrapped my arms around her, she grabbed onto my arms. "I won't let them take you away from me again." I whispered. "I won't let them hurt you again, Bella." I started to rub her back before I pulled away.

She looked at me through tear stained eyes. "This is the only way I know that you won't leave me, Edward."

Her words pierced through me. I wanted to say that I would never leave her, but I didn't know what will happen. It was too dangerous for her to be human around me or my family. I grimaced as I stared at her fragile frame. I didn't know how much more she could take, a person can only go through so much. I let out a painful sigh before nodding.

"I'll do it."

--

His words echoed through my ears and I smiled. "Thank you, Edward."

The situation was so surreal. I spent months daydreaming about this moment and now that it was here, I felt a little disappointed. I wanted something more to happen, something that could make everything fall into place and suddenly the last 

six months would just disappear, but nothing happened. It was just me wrapped up in Edward's arms. I closed my eyes as I let the remaining tears fall down my cheeks.

I knew it was going to hurt, but I didn't care. This was the only way I knew to keep him here. Edward kissed my neck before whispering, "Are you ready." I nodded, I wanted to add I've always been ready, but it was too late. He had already bit down. I screamed out in pain and shock.

**End.**

**A/N:** I'm not proud of this chapter. Now the epilogue! That's something that I am SEVERELY proud of. **READ THE EPILOGUE!**

Daddy's Little Cannibal


	6. Epilogue

**Disclaimer:** I don't own _Twilight_.

**Epilogue:  
A Long Way To Happy**

_Ten years later…_

I stared at the wooden door, a small smile playing on my lips. I was sitting down patiently. I had all the time in the world now. I looked at the coffee table next to me, a stack of old magazines laid out, I grabbed the top one and glanced through it, reading parts of articles that caught my attention.

A loud, "come in," knocked me back to reality. I smiled as I set the magazine back on the table and walked to the door. I knocked before walking in. An old man sat behind a desk, he was writing something down on a piece of white paper. He glanced up at me; I could hear his heart skip a couple of beats as his jaw dropped.

"Hello Dr. Burke." I smiled at him, my hand grazed over his desk. He kept his eyes on me as I walked behind his desk, sitting on the edge.

"That's impossible! You're dead!" He screamed at me. I laughed at the cliché phrase that every person uses in this kind of situation. Though I had to admit it did make sense. I looked down at him.

"I am dead, Dr. Burke." I smiled as I leaned into his face. He moved back. I grabbed his face between my long cold fingers. "I've missed you." I whispered. "I can't forget what you did to me…sometimes I lay awake at night and touch myself to the thought of what you did to me. Sick isn't it? That I find it more erotic to think about you raping me than I do to have my boyfriend touch me." I pushed his face away from me and hopped onto my feet.

"Have you ever read the novel, Lolita, Dr. Burke?" I asked. He shook his head. I frowned. "What a shame…good book. I think you might relate to the main character. He also liked little girls." I walked in front of his desk.

"Why are you here?" He asked his body was trembling with fear. "If you want money, I'll give you money."

I laughed bitterly. "I don't want your money, Dr. Burke." I spat out his last name. "No. I want something much sweeter than money." He got to his feet and ran for the front door. I smiled as I dashed to the door before he was even half way there. I waved my finger mockingly in front of his face. "Now where do you think you're going?"

He started to walk back. I grabbed his shoulder and pushed him onto the couch. I straddled his hips and leaned into his ear. "This is what you want Dr. Burke." I used his words against him. He let out an ear piercing scream as I sank my teeth into him.

--

I closed the door behind me. Rose was sitting in the chair that I was originally in. She glanced up at me before putting down the vogue magazine. She smiled sadly at me. "Ready?" She asked. I nodded.

We were headed to the car when I noticed the tree. The one I fed water to during my stay at the hospital. I smiled softly to myself. It was alive, the leaves that were once brown and frail, were now green and crisp. I felt my heart swell as I stared at the tree. Maybe there was hope after this place after all. I looked back at Rose; she was staring at me like I'd just grown another head. I smiled at her before walking out of the building for the last time.

I opened the door to the Mercedes and crawled in. Rose, was starting the cars as I licked the sleeve of Edward's jacket. It was a bittersweet moment. Rose looked at me as she pulled out of the parking lot. "What did you do with the body?" She asked as I continued to try and get the taste out of my mouth.

"He's face down on his desk with a bottle of rat poison." I mumbled. She nodded dropping the subject.

"Are you going to tell Edward?" I asked.

She looked at me and shook her head. "Don't worry; it'll be our little secret." I smiled.

Rose and I weren't friends; we were bonded by a familiar pain that we both shared. She was there when I needed someone to talk to. She understood the love/hate relationship I had with what Dr. Burke did to me. She helped me cope with it, as much as a person can. She told me about her story and I told her about mine. She helped Edward as much as she helped me, telling him to keep an eye on me. He did.

Edward is an amazing man and I love him more than anyone in my life. Through everything that happened to me, he didn't leave me, he didn't try to change me. He dealt with my crazy mood swings and sudden urges. He was patient and no matter what I did to him, he still loved me in the end.

Sometimes I catch myself day dreaming about Dr. Burke. It's a sick feeling to know that I sometimes wish that I could go back to him and let him touch me again. Rose never had that feeling, but she sympathized with me on other things. It was nice having someone to talk to, no matter how amazing Edward and Rose were towards me it still didn't stop the pain.

I don't know what happened to the other girls. I sometimes think about them. I wander what they're doing, if they ever found the help that they needed. I don't miss any of them, I never got close to any of them enough to miss them, but I think about them from time to time.

I don't know much about what happened to Charlie and Renee'. Charlie found a new wife and Renee' is still in Florida. I think about visiting them every now and then, not actually go up to them, but keep an eye on them. I miss them.

"Are you going to be ok?" Rose asked as she turned into the left lane.

I nodded. "Just thinking."

She frowned at me but turned her attention back to the road. A song was playing lightly on the radio. I turned it up. I listened to the words carefully. Rose looked at me, catching the lyrics to. "This song is sick." She scrunched up her nose.

I nodded in agreement and listened closely to the song. It ended and a radio DJ came on. "That was Otep with _Milk of Regret_, now we-"

I turned off the radio and leaned in my seat. Milk of Regret…I would have to download that song when we get home. I laughed to myself.

**End Epilogue.**

**A/N:** So the story is over with. Thanks to everyone that sucked it up and stuck through till the end. It really means a lot to me. I like the epilogue more than the last chapter. Everyone wanted Edward to kick Dr. Burke's ass, but I wanted Bella to. So I decided that I would have her pull a Rose move. I have a new story up and a couple of old stories that if you haven't checked out you totally should. There will **not** be a sequel to this story. Sorry ladies and gentlemen, I'm not big on sequels, they get kind of stupid. Though some people can pull it off I'm not one of those people. Thanks for reading and don't forget to review. It would totally suck balls if no one review this story anymore. I would cry. Seriously.

Daddy's little Cannibal


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